Jan 2011 05

Life is not about being perfect.

It’s about trying to do things better than the last time you did them.

In a few of these Project Vic posts I’ve talk about those “Hooray I Did It Right!” moments but along with those, there have been failures, too.

Curious? Take a look at the video.

This is the next in an ongoing series of videos where I blog about my own efforts to walk my talk as a mediator and mend my relationship with my dad. It’s one thing to be a terrific mediator when you’re with strangers dealing with a problem you’re not living with, and quite another to apply those skills when you get home to your family.

I’m going to update Project Vic, for better or worse, about once a week. I’m going to see my dad January 27-30, 2011 for his wedding and my book signing, so he’ll even be a guest blogger!

So stay tuned, and wish me luck!
Victor Mercer compares swallowing fluoride to putting it on your teeth!

Dec 2010 20

This is the next in an ongoing series of videos where I blog about my own efforts to walk my talk as a mediator and mend my relationship with my dad. It’s one thing to be a terrific mediator when you’re with strangers dealing with a problem you’re not living with, and quite another to apply those skills when you get home to your family.

The next post in this series will be on January 5, 2011.

As many difficulties as my dad and I have, it helps to remember the things he (and sometimes I) have done right.

As a young dentist, my dad worked on the research and development team that developed Crest toothpaste at Indiana University in the 1960’s. He was inspired by Joseph Mueller, Crest’s inventor, and Joe served as a mentor to my dad for many years.

My dad has always instilled in my a sense of professionalism and purpose in my work. Of course an important part of being a professional is to serve clients with exemplary expert service, but a true professional also dedicates part of his or her career to advancing the field.

Making Divorce Work endeavors to both help individual clients as well as advance the field of mediation.

I got the drive to do this from my dad, so I dedicated the book to him.

Of course, the minute I did that and sent it off to the publisher he did something that made me crazy. But sometimes that’s just the way life is. You can’t throw the good out with the bad. And the sense of professional duty my dad instilled in me is priceless.

I’m going to update Project Vic, for better or worse, about once a week. I’m going to see my dad January 27-30, 2011 for his wedding and my book signing, so he’ll even be a guest blogger!

So stay tuned, and wish me luck!

Dec 2010 11

Life’s all about tiny victories.

During the middle of a difficult visit to see my parents, I finally managed to say to my dad, “You know, you’ve been raising a lot of concerns about various stuff while I’ve been here, but somehow I have a feeling that you haven’t told me what you’re truly concerned about.”

Which opened the floodgate. Watch the video to hear what happened.

I’m going to post updates about once a week (with a hiatus for Christmas) about my own struggle to walk my talk as I mediate my own relationship with my father, Vic Mercer. We’ve had a difficult relationship since I was 15 years old, so now that my mother, the peacemaker in the family, has passed away, if I’m really the mediator I think I am it’s time to step up and mend this as best I can.

Wish me luck! I’ll keep you updated–and not just with the stuff that goes well. I promise.